Mercy

The thunder is rolling in right now. I'm excited to hear it. I need some drama stirred up in a healthy way to distract from the pain. This past week has been especially intense and triggering, but also beautifully hopeful. I learned and implemented a huge lesson. I was getting a massage and the woman was pressing way too hard on my back. It really hurt. But I thought I had to grin and bear it. But after 10 minutes of positively talking to myself, I asked her twice to be more gentle in a kind light-hearted way. As soon as she heard me and started to go more softly I starting weeping. My head was in that weird uncomfortable hole thing, so she didn't see me cry. God, forbid someone sees us crying, right? I'm so embarrassed to be a human. But, anyway, I cried because I realized I don't have to suffer unnecessarily. I can cry our for mercy. I can ask the universe to be a bit gentler with me. How so? Rest when you need rest. Cry when you're sad. Take space when you need space. Express your truth and your needs, while respecting others. It's so hard to love ourselves and make ourselves heard to others. We think we need to hold back our true selves. But things are truly shifting. We can let people see how sensitive we are. We don't have to pretend to be stronger than we are. We can cry out for mercy, and step away from things that hurt us. It's all going to be okay. If you speak your truth and lose people or situations because of it let them fall off. Follow your path, and include your fears, but don't allow them to get in your way. Keep going and remember to compassionately speak your needs. "Real love is bold, honest, and has boundaries." We no longer have to be fake martyrs who give until we are run dry or take so much we are about to break. Move forward as the gentle flower you are.